I’m rarely one to feel at a loss for words. Historically, I’ve jumped into the fray with my viewpoints and perspectives, expressing my values as clearly as I can. But I must admit that since the assassination on September 10th at UVU, my words have been unreachable—submerged beneath 20,000 leagues of emotion.
The next day, God was kind and threw me a lifeline, reminding me to study President Russell M. Nelson’s April 2023 address, “Peacemakers Needed.” When he first gave this address, His words became my quest, and I began re-evaluating everything I’ve ever said or written. I saw clearly that many times, in my zeal to “defend truth,” I’d let irritation, frustration, impatience, or even prejudice (against those who don’t share my Constitutional beliefs) move me to snarkiness, judgment, and sarcasm.
After first listening to this talk, I resolved to “lay down my weapons of [verbal] war” and show more Christ-like love and understanding. I actively prayed for Christ to live in me and change my heart so I could be filled with the pure love of Christ.
After September 10th, my prayer became more fervent. How did God want me to use my voice to bring unity, understanding, and peace? Where did my voice fit in this increasingly contentious and dangerous world? Was anyone even listening? Would I be ripped to shreds if I did speak out? Did what I have to say or write even matter?
Then, I witnessed Erika Kirk speak at her husband’s memorial service. I heard her magnanimously forgive the young man who had slain her husband—pointing out that he was EXACTLY the type of young man Charlie had sought to help through his work.
Something monumental shifted inside me that day. Erika Kirk modeled what God has been trying to teach me. She stood there, a heartbroken widow, with bravery and grace, a light shimmering in her eyes, revealing something undeniably holy giving her strength. She not only testified to the world of her faith in Jesus Christ but also embodied the transformative power of the Atonement of Jesus Christ to help us forgive the unforgivable… when we choose to do so.
A friend said it best yesterday: “Forgiveness is a decision before it is a feeling.”
Erika Kirk did not respond like people of the world. She responded like a true disciple of Jesus Christ. Her example rewired my soul more than a thousand sermons.
As I continued to watch the memorial service, I noted the stark contrast between her Christ-like example and other words—calls for maximum punishment for a “monster.” I felt like the meeting should have closed after Erika. Nothing more needed to be said. Christ is King! He forgave us. Let us forgive others.
On the other hand, I’m almost glad others were allowed to voice their struggles with forgiveness and model the human need for vengeance and anger. Why? Because those words were so jarring to me after Erika’s. They revealed something about myself. I saw just how desensitized I had become to the constant barrage of contention, anger, fault-finding, and snarky comments all sides throw at each other. “There is none good, no not one” (Romans 3:10).
In one sweeping motion, Erika’s modeling of Jesus’ words, “Father, forgive them for they know not what they do,” ripped the final scales from my eyes. And now that I see, I cannot unsee.
Our nation’s horrible addiction to anger, divisiveness, hatred, hostility, and self-righteousness is a million times worse than any political party, viewpoint, lifestyle, religious affiliation, or labeled -ism, -phobe, or -anti-this or that.
As President Lincoln reminded us, “A house divided against itself cannot stand.”
This divisive and contentious habit is the beam obstructing our national vision while we quibble, berate, and vilify our neighbors over tiny splinters in their eyes.
We are so fractious and divided that the very survival of our beloved nation and the freedoms it espouses are in peril.
In the words of the late, great President Russell M. Nelson:
“Anger never persuades. Hostility builds no one. Contention never leads to inspired solutions… Today, I am asking us to interact with others in a higher, holier way. Please listen carefully. ‘If there is anything virtuous, lovely, or of good report or praiseworthy’ (Philippians 4:8) that we can say about another person—whether to his face or behind her back—that should be our standard of communication.”
Will you stand with me in striving to be more Christ-like? More loving? More forgiving? More willing to look for the good and give one another the benefit of the doubt? Just because we think we are “right” doesn’t mean we have to tell everyone else that we are. Let’s remain true to our values and give each other some grace.
We are all a work in progress. We all need Jesus Christ. Let us be merciful, that we may obtain mercy.
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